Posts tagged nf

Posted 5 months ago

I ran into a “well, if this doesn’t work out then I’m moving on completely!” which I guess can be a good hard push to make sure you succeed yet…the all of nothing mentality isn’t one I can relate to. If you truly love something and love doing it how can a temporary setback result in forever failure? I would much rather iterate my way to success.

Posted 10 months ago
It’s actually more complex than it might seem. Perhaps, because it’s reflexive for me to adapt to the expectations of others. Being around someone that doesn’t have expectations for how I should or shouldn’t be, someone who lets me continually reveal myself and different sides of myself, is unique. I’m really rather bad at letting people see all of me, there are few people I’ve been comfortable enough to reveal different sides of myself around.
Posted 1 year ago

There is so much vulnerability in hope. When you hope you acknowledge that there is something you are seeking, something you want. Not getting that hurts, because it means something to you. So, we use fear to dull hope. Take the shine off things, don’t get your hopes up too much. That was when you crash it won’t be so bad. Yet…what happens when you don’t crash?

Posted 2 years ago

Feelings can tell you a lot if you listen. It seems like people will often either jump to a conclusion about why they’re feeling how they’re feeling or overanalyze to the point where the feelings are not felt. I find I have to accept and experience before I can explain (and then usually by talking to a couple friends about The Thing).

Posted 2 years ago

It’s important to do because these signals are easy to misread. I’m getting better at letting it become just noise I tune out. It’s important to get people to articulate their expectations. If they do not voice them you are just attempting to mind read. I’m not terribly bad at that but, if you’re mind (/body / intonation) reading then you can neither cleanly accept nor deny requests.

Posted 2 years ago

I feel like there’s this hurdle I have to jump over in relationships with people “it’s okay if I’m sad or afraid or feeling whatever it is I’m feeling. You don’t need to fix me or offer advice. I just need to be able to express my emotions.” Once we’re past that point and they realize I mean it, things are much easier. Having to bottle things up just makes them much worse for me.

Posted 2 years ago

Self-actualization is an important life goal to me—being more than I am now, always learning and growing. The other-but related-aspiration I have is for emotional honesty. Not just accepting the easy answer but, looking for the deeper reason. The truth, even if it isn’t a pleasant truth.

Posted 2 years ago

In love is a different thing. If I’m in love the person easily floats to the top of my list. I’m a workaholic, so just love isn’t enough for the person to be center stage. It’s a hard thing for me to balance. I love my work and what I do with my life, I forget about people at times. In love..the person is an anchor that does not bind me down. With love…I will empty my bank account for any of those people. I will hop on a plane without hesitation (I can set aside work but, I have to be aware something is up).

Posted 2 years ago

I don’t think I’ve started with hey…actual statement is context appropriate friendly gesture. The opener usually being a sad half-smile and a sigh/shrug.

Posted 2 years ago

If there’s one thing I would tell an NF on the job hunt: interview your boss. I had one that was passive-aggressive and micromanaged me. That job was a nightmare. At the same job, I later had a different boss who gave me freedom and sheltered me from drama—huge difference. A good boss can make a bad company acceptable, a bad boss can make a good company painful.